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    October 28

    10.28

     
     
     
     
     
     
    我生了一场大病。每天都不知道是该哭还是该笑。也不知道是饿还是饱。只知道需要喝很多很多的水,为了干涸的泪坎再蓄满水。偶尔很无力,无力到瘫坐在房间里,时光飞逝,一天又一天,任凭阳光从头晒到脚。偶尔很兴奋,吃很多很多肉,喝很多很多酒,然后告诉身边的每个人,我从来没有过的开心。偶尔很失落,湿润的眼眶不敢偷看朋友同情的脸庞。我把自己捆绑的死死的。然后听很多情歌,虽然很痛,但是,为了记住你,我宁愿承担我做的选择。对,我要记住你,记住你曾经托起我脸庞温柔的告诉我的那些诺言。记住你忍耐我臭脾气的瞬间。记住你喝完酒后疯狂的威胁我只属于你一个人。记住你气急败坏的吓唬我敢离开你就试试看。可是,直到今天,我才知道,原来曾经的用盐水浸泡过的伤口,又再次被琵藤抽打的皮开肉绽,疼到昏厥。我们谁都不怪,我们折磨自己,我们是一群以为很牛x的大傻x。我们玩各种游戏,但是游戏却只把我们当作角色来操控。我们道听途说,误会+误会,然后学会背叛撒谎,伤害爱自己的人。我们十恶不赦,学会哭泣道歉,以为还能再次站起来前行,其实已经连缓气的力量都不存在。我们输得很彻底,可是在外人面前还是要努力装成牛b烘烘的各种人物。我不会原谅你,因为我要记住你,都说仇恨要化解开来需要宽广的心胸,我要把对你的仇恨积压在内心的最底层,随着空气的进入,慢慢,慢慢的将充满整个心房。所以,我会记住你,越来越多,越来越重。希望我们这辈子的爱可以化解上辈子的恨,期盼下辈子,我们,可以相伴走完一生.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    10.28.09
     
     
     
     
     
     

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    我们还是会忘却痛苦去迎接另外一个开始的,,,
    Oct. 28

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